The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
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