Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
When I look at old family photos I know how jessica simpson feels when she watches dukes of hazzard
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
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