Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
just found out i can blow out the flame on the grill lighter fill my mouth with butane and ignite a fireball
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
This has to be the weirdest conversation I've ever had sober and in the middle of the day before.
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Next time you decide to post pictures of yourself in your underwear on facebook, please don't tag me as your bulge.. My mom spent 10 minutes looking for me in that picture. I had to tell her I was hiding.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
He's making me do the dishes for the next month and half because I shit in the bath tub...
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
