Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
The stoners next door have their couch on the sidewalk again, shirtless, soaking their feet in a baby pool and listening to loud ukulele music. I want their life.
I'm doing shots of crown out of a baby bottle. My friends are sensational parents.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
i want to say his dick was in it but not his heart
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