Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Do you have any puffy paint? I want to put "fiesta muthafuckas" on my sombrero but its too much to bedazzle.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize