he just tried to lick my eyebrow. thats the deal breaker.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
And on the first day of my adult job, I matched with one of my co workers on tinder...
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Randomize
