Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
boyfriend # 1 is in the bathroom and boyfriend # 2 is ringing the doorbell need back up this is not a drill i repeat this is not a drill
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
She's crying about either her ex boyfriend, her one night stand, or her own puke. None of those is worth the tears.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
Is offering to blow your HR rep considered an ethics violation?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Randomize
