2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
I just had a dream that I was fighting Donald Trump... Gotta stop watching the news before bed
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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