just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Mid stroke she told me she'd had bigger. Replied I could tell. Sex ended right at that moment.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
