my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
In Canada she would be a 10 but here in America she's only a 7
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'll come out for a little. I can't be visibly hungover at work again or I get written up and fired. And yes, I am aware of how alcoholic that sounds.
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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