He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
apparently i'm really good at getting wasted, having sex all night, getting multiple hickeys and oversleeping father's day brunch. this is the third year its happened.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
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