sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Is it bad that we left the kid passed out on the bus? I think his name was texas. I was too drunk to be questioning this.
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Randomize
