you guys were way drunker than both of me
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
So that prostitue I banged at Steve's bachelor party just texted and invited me to a BBQ at her parents. Never again doubt the power of the cock piercing.
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I've amended my previous statement: I'm not allowed to put in my two weeks till I ask out the waitress. Now I have motivation on two levels
Randomize
