Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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