Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
Randomize
