i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
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