whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
my dad just walked in on my jacking off and all he had to say was "I thought you were bigger than that".... thanks dad.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Way too hungover to be taking this many family pictures
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally paid cover, got kicked out. Tried to explain that I was just clumsy, but mispronounced it. Then I got pissed off, stormed out..and clotheslined myself on a velvet rope. How was your night?
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
did i just pee glitter
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
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