The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
I couldn't find any flowers so I brought her a cat.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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