It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
I don't understand or I understand perfect - if were not talking about fried chicken I'm not sure what's happening.
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
