he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
Randomize
