he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
He ran into the surf holding up a cigarette yelling "let the Olympic games begin!" So no, no vodka left.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
