Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
HOnestly. That's my one goal for this whole trip. I don't give a shit about souvenirs or sand. I want penis.
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
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