I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Naw but when she was in the bathroom I threw the condom out the window and I'm pretty sure it hit some girl
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
He let me share his family pack of hot pockets with him. Chivalry isn't dead after all.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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