He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
Randomize