I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
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