i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
the fundamentals of my vasectemy are strong
...so i touched it.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
THIS TIME TOMORROW MY VAG IS GONNA BE BRAND SPANKING NEW.
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