Facebook is asking me which Pokemon I'd be. Is there one whose only moves are gay sex and reading Adrienne Rich?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
And then he said "I can't get blown while Gordon Bombay and Mr. Holland stare at me from the TV"
Someone just asked me to go to the dining hall for dinner and he will use one of his swipes to pay for my meal. i think this is a college version of a date
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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