Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize
