He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
my still drunk mind thought "hey this is a really good time to stand in the middle of the street barely clothed in 20 degree weather at 4 am talking about the blow job i gave him soph year of high school"
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I feel horrible. I brought her to your house like a late night pizza delivery and dropped her off.
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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