He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
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