Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
Yah, I guess one silver lining is I'd never seen a full water cooler get thrown down a flight of stairs, gotta appreciate the little things
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
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