Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Idk if I want to put a bra on
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
