is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
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