Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
You kept running into the wall most of the night. When people asked you what you were doing you told them you were the kool-aid man and there was little kids on the other side of the wall who needed your juice
We raised our shot glasses and you screamed out "TO MY DAD FINALLY GOING TO REHAB!"
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Ugh, once again I had to block the view of him peeing off the hotel bar balcony, I earned those free drinks!
I deserve this hangover.
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