Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
You overflowed the toilet cuz you tried to flush apples. you said they were singing too loudly
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Told my brother the truth how I meet her...I grabbed the first thing I could when the cops came. 10 months later we are engaged.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
cops tried arresting me on the way to class this morning.. this is my life.
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
The only person who DOESN'T think it's a horrible idea to sleep with my ex is my therapist. Obviously I trust her judgement above all others.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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