yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
There is not greater feeling than lying to your boss and leaving work to shit in the comfort of your own home
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I can't turn off my feet"
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
