kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just told my shrink " this was a year for whoring around"
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize