god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
I literally stabbed myself so I had a valid reason to get out of having sex with her
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
Not only did I get the promotion, but last night after sex he took me outside and let me hold it for him while he peed in the snow. I made a heart. This week is going amazing
My vagina is very pro this idea
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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