Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
I just shaved my pubes into a heart shape. if that doesn't scream romantic idk what does
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
