we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
You set a couch on fire in my brothers backyard?
Just the cushions
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