On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
sleeping in bed with your booty calls married sister...you're the stuff heroes are made of.
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
I mean, drunk me really liked him, maybe sober me will too. Who am I to deny fate?
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Randomize
