Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
nothing says "fuck you jocks from high school my life is better than yours" like bringing 5 grand in 20s to the bar
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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