something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
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