she pinky promised me she was 18
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
When I told the bartender it was my 21st birthday, he looked at me all pissed and said "But you've been drinking here as 21 for the past 2 years.." How do you THINK the night went?
So I take it free shots were a no after that?
Randomize
