can we get nightvision for the apartment?
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
She rode me like a jockey on that tiny couch. Then we spooned.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
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