I wish you could order shots online.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
You said you couldn't use your body anymore so you made me push the buttons on your phone while you made alien sound effects
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Randomize
