if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
Randomize