I'm jealous of your bromance
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
DID YOU OR DID YOU NOT, PEE IN MY FUCKING TRASHCAN?!
Randomize
