I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I legitimately just tried to piss above my head. I got to my chest at highest. There's piss everywhere.
They high fived over us while we gave them synchronized blowjobs. In the same bed. Under the same blanket.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I don't know how it happened. All I did was tell her I was impressed by her presentation. Her nail marks on my back ain't going away anytime soon.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
