I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm eating Doritos that I crushed up n put in a cup so I only have to chill minimally.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
also, i am in no position to judge as my life choices today went along the lines of "YAY VODKA". for breakfast.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
I think I just sharted jello shots
But you''re still having sex with him. And a hobo convinced you to.
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