I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
Quiet hours sex sucks. I hate finals.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
and then i signed some dudes back with a turkey hand print in honor of thanksgiving
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Randomize
