Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
