So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Randomize